Final Bore

When wrestling fans attend a live event, they are often treated to a sub-par match or two. Sometimes the participants are not talented mat technicians, meaning they just are not good wrestlers. Sometimes they are capable of putting on a better match, but for some reason, fail to do so. Either way, smart wrestling fans know just what to do: "booooooorrrr---iiiiinnngggggg, booooorrrr--iiinnnggg..." Just chant "bor-ing" and the match will end quickly.

I tried this technique Saturday night during the men's Final Four. Much to my dismay, it did not work. Was it the teams involved? Or did they just under perform? The answer is "si, senor."

I'll take "Final Four letdown" for $200 please, Alex. One of the least-anticipated Final Four Saturdays in recent memory was punctuated by horrendous play on the part of George Mason and LSU. Combine tight, poor-shooting, sloppy basketball by the losers with great defense by the winners and that is precisely what you get: a letdown.

Remember, I believe I forewarned everyone that more early upsets lead to poorer quality games later on in the tournament. I could not believe how many so-called experts thought this was "the best tournament in history." Apparently one great Cinderella run + lots of upsets + low shooting percentages + weaker talent = "the best tournament ever". I was also accurate in predicting an inevitable letdown by this tournament as a whole coming off the best ever set of Elite Eight games in history last season. The level of play last year was higher, the talent was at least more polished, and the names mattered. Not so this year.

I'm not tooting my horn, because Lord knows I'm wrong about most everything I predict. But the big picture is something I think I actually grasp. I'm just failing to understand why mainstream writers/analysts are not seeing it the same way. Thoughts anyone?

Moving on to the women's Final Four. Yes, they have one of those too. My excitement on women's college basketball has waned considerably following this weekend. Yes, the Lady Heels lost and that was sad. But the game has a total of 43 turnovers. The point guard for Maryland had 12 by herself, and her team won. I'll pay to watch my cousins play ball any day over that.

So here is the scene: I came back from the beach a little early, timing my trip just right to roll into Wild Wing Cafe in Anderson, SC to see the second half of the UNC/Maryland game and hopefully Wrestlemania. No Wrestlemania, which was apparently not that good, but I did stay to eat and watch the game.

To my left was a couple who I would have placed as freshmen in college. I was proven wrong when the scrawny dude (yes, I have the right to say scrawny in this case) attempted to order a hard drink and was denied (Sunday law in South Carolina). But this guy was straight out of the Hollister Spring Catalogue. His perfectly tussled hair, his matching denim jacket and jeans with pre-produced tears/holes/frays, and his cute kids-size large t-shirt completed the look. Sitting cross-legged (woman style), he stroked the hand of his surprisingly cute companion. Together, they weighed a combined 215lbs, max.

To my right was a couple straight out of Walhalla, Pickens, Anderson, or Pendleton. Racing t-shirts...local racing, that is, not NASCAR. Probably tipping the scales at a combined 600lbs or so. They probably raise cattle...as in they have 3 kids.

Somehow in front of me were to Carolina Law School grads. Hell really has frozen over, Tar Heels everywhere apparently turned out to watch the Lady Heels in the Final Four. Everything went great until the guy asked me if I had watched the men's games on Saturday night.

"Worst Final Four games I've seen," he declared.

"Actually," I started, "the Marquette vs Kansas game three years ago was the worst I've seen...Marquette just didn't come to play-"

"Yeah, I went to Marquette for undergrad, it was horrible," said the guy.

What are the odds I'd end up bashing Marquette to an alum during the women's Final Four at a Wild Wing Cafe in Anderson, SC? You just can't make up stuff like that.

Pray that tonight's national title game turns out to be great. By the way, I'm tied in my office pool entering tonight's game. No points could be earned to break the tie after last weekend, so my buddy and I are settling the pool based on the championship game spread we picked three weeks ago. Problem is we both had a Duke vs UCONN final, not UCLA vs Florida. I have 154, he has 160. Anything 156 or lower, I win. That is the extent of my interest tonight.

The pick: Florida 74
UCLA 62

A first for The Blue Team: column coming on NC State later this week. Get out your Wolfpack finger signs and nWo t-shirts...

Also, the baseball predictions will be here eventually. I'm not reading anyone else's, so it'll just be me guessing.

Kid Rock rocks Clemson's Littlejohn Coliseum Thursday night. I have to go, the humor will be off the charts. 'Cause I wanna be a cow-boy ba-by...